Perspective

That's what I gained today. As most mornings go, I hurried to get ready, packed up my two kids, and rushed out of the house. On my way to the hospital I remembered that I was meeting up with some friends for supper. These are friends who I haven't seen in months and they are always put together, new cute clothes, perfect makeup, hair done up all fancy. I realized I wouldn't have time to go home before meeting up with them and I was embarrassed that I had on a frumpy old shirt and hadn't really gotten ready today. I thought maybe I would even buy a new shirt before supper to make me feel better.

When I got to the hospital, Clark was waiting for me because today was the day he would go outside. With two nurses, me, and Mom at his side, he was wheeled down the hall and through the doors. For the first time in five weeks, Clark felt the sun on his face, he smelled fresh air, he heard the birds, he felt the breeze on his skin. I felt the sun differently too as I stepped out from the shade. We just sat outside and talked, watching others and the hustle and bustle of life. The nurses continued to administer medicine and watch the monitors closely. Clark didn't want to go inside but of course he had to. Clark cringed in pain as four nurses picked him up by his sheets to move him back into bed. One asked, "Was it worth it?" Clark's answer was a definite yes and he was already anxious to go outside again. It took a lot of work to get all the cords and tubes and machines and medicines hooked back up.

Earlier in the day, Clark was able to swoosh some Mountain Dew and orange juice. It was still sitting on the counter so he asked me for some more. I held the straw to his mouth and watched him take in a mouthful, swish it around, and suck it out. He looked right at me as his shoulders relaxed. He let out a sigh and said, "That tastes so good!" What pleasure it brought me to raise that straw to his mouth again for another taste. He said he wanted two sips of orange juice, followed by two sips of water. I asked him if it was satisfying enough just to swish or if he even wanted to swallow. He said that it's really hard not to swallow. I brushed his teeth for him, wiped his face, and put Vaseline on his lips. Before leaving I asked if he wanted me to bring anything else for him to try tomorrow. He looked at me with pleading eyes and nodded yes. I asked what he would like and his answer made me laugh, "Bring lots of stuff. I want to swish everything!" I made some suggestions and his biggest requests were for Root Beer, Strawberry Fanta, and Pepsi. I walked out of his room on a natural high.

Again in the car, driving to meet up with my girl friends, I look down at my shirt. I scolded myself and thought "HOW VAIN!" I thought of my brother, laying in a hospital bed for over five weeks. He got to see the sun today. He got to taste orange juice today. He is alive today! And I'm worried about what shirt I'm wearing? Really? Not now! I felt so great I thought I was walking on air. I held my head up high, wearing that frumpy old shirt, thankful for the blessings in my life.

Perspective. That's what I gained today!